I’m a medical student.
Which means I spend a lot of time learning how the body works, how the brain adapts, and how fragile the line between balance and collapse can be.

But the most difficult battles I’ve observed so far are not the ones we study in textbooks.

They’re the quiet ones.
The ones we fight with ourselves.

The fight with our own subconscious is not an easy one. It demands resilience, discipline, and honesty. And maybe the hardest part is this: you are fighting something that belongs to you — for your own good.

So why is it so difficult?

Because both we, and especially our subconscious, are comfortable.
The brain does not like leaving its comfort zone, even when it knows that, in the long term, change would be beneficial.

How We Lie to Ourselves (Without Realizing It)

Many people don’t even realize they are lying to themselves. They think they are being positive.

“I woke up at 7 a.m. for nothing,” someone might say.
“But at least tonight I’ll be tired and fall asleep faster.”

And yes — that might be true.

But what also happens is that the subconscious quietly registers this as approval.
It learns that resistance was justified. That discomfort was rewarded.

You defended it.

And the next time, it will do the same thing — only more confidently.

This is how self-deception works: not loudly, not dramatically, but politely, wrapped in rationalizations that sound reasonable and kind.

When Positivity Becomes Toxic

We are often encouraged to “look on the bright side,” and in many situations, this is genuinely helpful. But there is a point where positivity stops being healing and starts becoming harmful.

Toxic positivity doesn’t deny reality — it reframes it just enough to protect comfort.

We justify avoidance.
We excuse stagnation.
We protect habits that quietly keep us stuck.

Discipline, on the other hand, is not punishment.
It is containment.

It creates a structure strong enough to hold discomfort without collapsing into excuses. And that is often the moment when real change becomes possible.

What Medicine and Psychology Have Taught Me

In medicine and psychology, we talk about anxiety, depression, burnout, somatization, maladaptive coping mechanisms. These are not abstract concepts. They are lived experiences that show up in the body, in sleep patterns, in motivation, in concentration, in immune response.

Anxiety and depression are among the most prevalent mental health conditions worldwide. They are often comorbid, sharing biological mechanisms such as dysregulation of the HPA axis and imbalances in neurotransmitters like serotonin and noradrenaline.

But beyond the mechanisms, there is something else that repeats itself again and again:
resistance to change, even when suffering is obvious.

The body speaks when the mind refuses to listen.

Where Chinese Metaphysics Entered the Conversation

Alongside my medical studies, I was exposed to Chinese metaphysics — particularly Ba Zi and Traditional Chinese Medicine. Not as belief systems, but as structured ways of observing patterns over time.

What struck me was not how different they are from psychology, but how similar the questions actually are.

Psychology talks about unconscious patterns.
Ba Zi talks about predispositions.

Psychology speaks of defense mechanisms.
Chinese metaphysics speaks of blocked Qi.

Different languages.
The same human reality.

Carl Jung once said:

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

In Ba Zi, we literally call it a Destiny Chart.

That coincidence is not accidental.

At some point, theory stopped being enough for me. I didn’t want symbolic explanations — I wanted structure. I wanted to see timing, predispositions, and pressure points laid out clearly, not just felt intuitively. That’s when I started using BaZi Advisor — not as a belief system, but as a practical tool to visualize how time interacts with my own structure. It became a way to check patterns for myself, quietly and consistently, especially when my body or focus started sending mixed signals.

(If you’re curious, this is the analysis tool I personally use: https://baziadvisor.com/analysis)

When Effort Is Not Enough

We often believe success comes from effort alone — long hours, discipline, pushing harder. And while effort matters, it is not the whole story.

In Feng Shui, the principle is simple:
when Qi is blocked, even the most motivated person struggles to move forward.

In psychology, we say the same thing differently: internal resistance, emotional blocks, and environmental stressors create friction that leads to self-sabotage.

The environment you live in, study in, rest in — it shapes you quietly, continuously, often without your awareness.

You don’t need to believe in metaphysics to observe this.
You only need to pay attention.

Five Blockages, One Pattern

Over time, I began to notice the same types of blockages appearing in people — in therapy rooms, in classrooms, and in metaphysical charts:

mental overload and rumination
emotional stagnation and unresolved attachment
lack of will and chronic procrastination
loss of meaning and direction
physical exhaustion and burnout

Medicine addresses them through therapy, medication, lifestyle changes.
Chinese metaphysics addresses them through timing, environment, and energetic balance.

Not as replacements — but as complements.

A Different Way of Looking at Balance

What I find most valuable is not choosing between science and metaphysics, but allowing them to speak to each other.

Psychology helps us understand why we struggle.
Chinese metaphysics can sometimes show where and when that struggle becomes activated.

Neither removes responsibility.
Both ask for awareness.

And perhaps that is the real work:
not fighting ourselves harder, but understanding ourselves more clearly.

Balance is not an abstract ideal.
It is something you build, day by day, choice by choice — sometimes with discipline, sometimes with support, and sometimes by finally admitting that comfort is not the same as safety.